A Man Who Knows His Math

This email just tickled my funny bone and had to share!


MAN WHO KNOWS HIS MATH

He writes:I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver, who cut right in front of a pickup truck, causing the driver to drive onto the shoulder to avoid hitting her..

This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window and gave the woman the finger..

'Man, that guy is stupid,' I thought to myself.

I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic, and here's why:

I drive 48 miles each way every day to work..
That's 96 miles each day.
Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to bumper
Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway.
There are 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles..

That works out to 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars.
Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper-to-bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars.

That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars that I pass every day..

Statistically, females drive half of these.
That's 18,000 women drivers!

In any given group of females, 1 in 28 has PMS.
That's 642.

According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding.
That's 449.

According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered homicide.
That's 98.

And 34% describe men as their biggest problem.
That's 33..

According to the National Rifle Association, 5% of all females carry weapons and this number is increasing.

That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY, I drive past at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously considered homicide, has PMS, and is armed.

Give her the finger?
I don't think so!!!!!

Boys of Summer - Where Did You Go?

Its cold, dreary and dark when I got up this the morning. I saw on Facebook this morning that it was snowing in Salmon, Idaho. Brrrrr!!! Thank goodness we haven’t had that kind of cold snap yet – I’ll get a few more (weeks hopefully) of produce out of my garden and orchard.

It seems like just last week that it was sunny, in the 90’s and beautiful weather. No wait! That was last week!! Oh well, it is the season of sudden changes. We could definitely use the rain - so I’m not complaining Sadri just commenting. J

I was just really surprised when I realized that it is still VERY dark at 6:15 when I got my kids up this morning. I could swear it was still light out at 5:30am - just yesterday, but obviously not. It’s funny how the march of time keeps going even though we’re not as in tune with our environment or put personal awareness on hold.

The Ultimate

I saw the funniest sign the other day. I had to double check to make sure what I was reading was correct.

It was one of those the big lighted outside signs for an old grocery store in a “one horse town” on a little back woods state highway.

It advertised something to the effect that the “Go Get ‘Em” had:

Gas, Groceries, Tanning, Body Toning AND you could get your Chainsaws Sharpened there.

Now that’s what I call a Pacific NW small town one stop shop!!!